An aging ham ponders life
There are times when the familiar cold hand reaches out to me, accompanied by a darkness in the skies of my mind. Like the disruptive friend who just doesn't seem to get the hint, no matter how blunt you make it, or maybe it is more like the uncomfortable yet obligatory visit of your parents... Continue Reading →
Today, I am reminded of one of my previous articles, about my panic attacks. It dawned on me that it has been quite a while since I've had one... almost since I posted the article. Yet I am confronted by another troubling issue. My dear daughter, who appears to be suffering from her own version... Continue Reading →
Some days I remember What I knew; How it felt; Who I was. Lonely voices tell me It was real; It was truth; It was me. I recall a poem I once wrote; I once felt; I once knew. I sit with others in a crowded room. I talk with others in a crowded room.... Continue Reading →
This brings the story to almost now, and there are things happening in my life now that once upon a time, I may have been unable to manage, and may very well have found myself contemplating the unthinkable yet again. Yet I am not. I feel I have "matured," and in the true sense of... Continue Reading →
I was changing my view of the world. What I began to realise, and not just superficially, but innately, was just how much our world view is dependent on our individual perspectives. We aren't just all different, we see the world differently. Yet the evidence is all around us. I began to appreciate how much... Continue Reading →
I left off at a very dark place with my last post on this, and it got darker. My emotions slowly grew in strength and I struggled to maintain my rational self. I began fantasising ways I could end my life, and yet leave wife and daughter able to carry on financially. I thought that... Continue Reading →
So with the events of my trip to the UK behind me, and my still aching ego nagging at me, I nursed my wounds for a short while. Then I ended up back at uni, this time as an employee. I got straight back into my theatre work, and resigned myself to the life of... Continue Reading →
Upon my return home, somewhat relieved, but bitterly disappointed in myself, some interesting stories unravelled over the course of a few weeks. First I need to explain one thing before getting to the meat. While I was in the UK, my cat had passed away. He was a gorgeous Russian Blue, and incredibly intelligent. When... Continue Reading →
Well, here we go again. It wasn't long ago that I was inspired to write about my youth and struggles with depression. Now I find I am again surrounded by reasons to continue. In the first part of my journey, I really didn't know what was going on, and certainly didn't accept that I was... Continue Reading →
This weekend has been a rather interesting weekend. First I bump into a friend who tells me they struggle with their Vlog. Please check it out. Something I am very familiar with with regards my blog, having struggled for a long while to find anything interesting in myself to blog about, I can understand the... Continue Reading →
Reflection of a Ham 